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Amanda Allen – Reflections On The Eve of CrossFit 13.5!

Amanda Allen CrossFit

(Image: Facebook)

I sit here at the dog park, reflecting after another double day of training. Its 17-hours until the announcement of 13.5. I’m sitting in 9th place worldwide, ready for the final workout of the 2013 CrossFit Open! I hope 13.5 is all that Dave Castro has promised!

There has not been a single hour over the past 10 months (since my disappointing 4th place finish at the 2012 Regionals) that I have not thought about and been working toward a podium finish at the 2013 Regionals!

10 months, 7 days per week, averaging 3-4 hours of training per day, complimented by 1-1.5 hrs of active recovery per day (massage, stretch, roll, float) – representing approximately 1500 hours of my life!

I’ve invested my heart and soul into my CrossFit dream! I am drawn-on and compelled by my desire to compete at the CrossFit Games again as an individual! It fuels me, I visualise it constantly, when warming up, when out running, when eating, drifting off to sleep and in moments of doubt. I imagine being at Camp Pendleton, getting to the top of the hill before Julie Foucher! It’s so palpable, so very real for me – every moment of everyday my dream informs my every decision!

As I write this, I also realise that when I am in the burning depths of a workout there is no noise at all, no other thoughts of athletes or beating anyone – there’s just breathing and counting and an acute awareness of every millimetre of every rep… of holding pace like a metronome. Its pure – meditation and suffering melded into one acute experience of being very, very alive! Its finding the heart if stillness in the fire of movement.

Amanda Allen CrossFit

I was speaking to my dear friend Mareike today about the low hum of fear I feel everyday before every workout and training session. Every time I turn up to training, I know that I am going to meet myself in a place of immense discomfort. I am comfortable with this discomfort – but there is always the knowing, the fear and the apprehension! I often find myself delaying interval sessions that I do by myself — wasting time before the inevitable pain!

Sometimes I laugh at this process, sometimes I think there is something wrong with me for being this way, then I realise that it’s natural and normal to feel this way in the face of pending death! I think that’s what interval training is like – almost dying, repetitively, by choice! No other animal on the planet does this knowingly to themselves! Of course I will feel fear and want to avoid it! But I always step-up and give 150% of everything I have, every time! Fear is normal.

When Dave Castro announced a blood bath, I got excited. My spirits lifted! This is interesting to me! Why did I respond this way? I think it’s because I know I can go there, over and over, longer and longer, heavier and heavier.  I can die in a workout repeatedly and get back up again and again – stronger and stronger each time!

The bloodbath is familiar territory, a bit like home! Come what may, I’m ready Dave!

  • Naomi Benedetti

    You are an absolute legend and an amazing writer Amanda. Reading that gave me tingles! I wish I had an ounce of your enthusiasm and dedication. I’ll be cheering you on loudly at regional’s. I’m not wishing you luck, you don’t need it. I wish you the time of your life!

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The Rx Review is an independent fitness website, reporting on the Sport of Fitness, functional fitness news, The CrossFit Games, health and diet related information, and also provides reviews on sports performance products.